To Be Young and Dumb…

very cute if i say so myself...and i do:)

very cute if i say so myself...and i do:)

Hello World!!!

Happy Wednesday! I struggled whether to write about this topic, but since it has been the talk of town in the A since last week I decided to throw my two cents in the bucket as well…

So most black people across the nation have heard of the illustrious black institutions of the Atlanta University Center  (AUC) that have produced some of the nation’s greatest black leaders. It is pretty much one of the crown jewels of this city. Such notables including Dr. Martin Luther King and Maynard Jackson, Atlanta’s first black mayor, attended Morehouse College. Marian Wright Edelman, founder of the Children’s Defense Fund, and Alice Walker, author of “The Color Purple,” attended Spelman College. James Weldon Johnson, author of the Negro national anthem “Lift Every Voice and Sing” and Marva Collins, famed educator, attended Atlanta University and Clark College, respectively,  now known as Clark Atlanta University. And this is just a cursory list for brevity’s sake.

But since last week one of the AUC’s schools, Morehouse College, has not been in the news for its positive contributions to the nation’s brain trust. Rather it has been the news for its new dress code.  According to an article in the “The Atlanta Journal-Constitution” below are the parameters of the new dress code.

The policy details 11 expectations of students, including:

* no caps, do-rags and/or hoods in classrooms, the cafeteria, or other indoor venues

* no sun glasses worn in class or at formal programs

* no jeans at major programs, as well as no sagging pants on campus

* no clothing with derogatory or lewd messages either in words or pictures

* no wearing of clothing usually worn by women (dresses, tops, tunics, purses, pumps, etc.) on the Morehouse campus or at college-sponsored events.

Students that violate the new rules risk academic suspension.

Let me address the issues that have folk up in arms: sagging pants and cross dressing. Here in the A, lawmakers have been grappling with the saggy pants issues for the past couple of years or so. They believe this fashion statement is disrespectful and even promotes a certain thug or criminal mentality.  So this issue is nothing new.

And the other issue is cross dressing….and just for the record I am not looking for this post to be a discussion on gay rights. But apparently, many of the Morehouse College students are dressing in clothing typically associated with women’s attire to class and other campus-associated events.

So since this is my blog, I guess I need to go ahead and state my opinion. I don’t like sagging pants. I have been known to walk up to teenage boys on the street and pull up their pants without their permission. I imagine I have gotten away with this because I’m cute, haha. On one occasion, I asked this dude was his little behind cold as I could practically see it as his pants sagged way under his butt cheeks. And it was cold outside…I know he was cold and there was no way he could deny it. In fact, his boy who was was him had to smile when I told him so. In church on Sunday, one of the speakers offered to buy some belts for Christmas for some of the boys in the congregation who may not have the financial means to buy belts. It was a joke but he wasn’t joking…

Now on to the cross dressing…One of my mottos is “do you.” And I imagine that is what many of these students are thinking when they wear women’s attire on campus. All that aside, is that attire really appropriate in class?  When I was in college, it was hard enough to focus on the instructor and the coursework without any distractions. You cannot tell me that wearing women’s attire to class as a young man is not distracting to the other students. Now, I heard that some of the students believe they should be allowed to wear whatever they want as they are paying for their education. I understand that train of thought up until a certain point. I often missed days in a row of class (sorry mom and dad!) in college using that same principle. I thought since I’m paying for class I can show up when I want to…But at the same time, it would have been arrogant and maybe even delusional for me to assume the professor would give me the same attention as was given to the other students as I clearly did not respect the teacher’s time enough to show up for class.

Aside from those opinions, I also understand what it means to be “young and dumb.” When you are young and dumb, you rarely think of consequences, ramifications and implications…And to some degree, you shouldn’t…The Bible explains this principle perfectly…

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. I Corinthians 13:11

In my 36 years, I have made many a fashion statement being the proudly creative person that I am. I used the above picture because it was one of my fashion statements I guess…More than 10 years ago, I went to this club and saw this dude who looked like a pimp in his white Fedora-style hat and his wide-collared shirt. He was the business as the young folk say now…(I can’t believe I’m saying this ,but hey I am 36.) I thought to myself, “Why don’t I act like I’m one of his hoes?” So I asked this guy, who I didn’t know, if I could stage this pic with him where he was telling me to get his money. Remember that song “$itch Betta Have My Money?” That was the look I was going for…All of my girls who were with me thought I was hilarious and gutsy…It was a very cute picture…Aww, to be young and dumb…

And for the record, if I were 10 or so years younger, I would be rocking a red mohawk…I’m just sayin’. But that time has come and gone…

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven…Ecclesiastes 3:1

Any thoughts?

Rainy Night in Georgia…aka Where is God When It Rains?

Hello World!!!

I must confess…As a single person, it is easy to get self-centered…after all, you pay bills for one, you eat with one, you wake up with one…so it only makes sense you wouldn’t be very much concerned with anyone — except me, myself & I…

But last week, as it rained, rained, rained and rained some more here in A, even I was forced to take a look around and survey the damage…People were getting into rowboats from their windows to escape rising water in their homes, folks were stranded in their cars  as they floated in the flood, people lost their businesses to the unforgiving currents and some even lost their lives…We may not have experienced floods comparing to Hurricane Katrina, but many were devastated nonetheless…

If you are anything like me, you are wondering why God allows these type of events to happen from time to time…there may be a clue in His word obviously…

He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. Matthew 5:45

So according to that verse, good and bad happen to the good and bad…somehow, that doesn’t seem quite right, does it?…it seems to me like if you are a Christian, you should have a sort of a heavenly insurance policy when bad things are happening all around you…it would seem that if you are trying to stay in His will, then He should be willing to spare you and yours when natural disasters or even unnatural disasters happen…But I am mature enough in this Christian walk to know that, yes, sometimes due to your status as a Christian, God will protect in you in ways that other people who aren’t Christian do not know about…but I also know that God often allows circumstances to happen to Christians to increase their faith in him and his sovereignty…

Yes, God is the ultimate Father…every Christian believes that…and so if we believe that, do we also believe that like earthy fathers, our Heavenly Father must punish us from time to time…Some people don’t think so, but as much as I am a “God is Love” Christian, I cannot ignore stories like Noah in the Bible…last week, some of my Facebook friends were joking about needing an ark because it was raining so much…but as I read their status updates, I began to consider that Noah and his family needed the ark, because our Father was destroying the land by water due to the evilness of the people at that time. So was God punishing Atlanta last week for some sin…was God punishing the city of New Orleans for some sin…who can say…God allowed Noah to know that was the case, and I believe that because that story was included in the Bible, we have to consider its ramifications…

For some of those who were affected by the flood last week, it may have been simply a case of God allowing things to happen to everyone…we don’t always know why, but believers in God can be assured that He will see them through…And for some, if you believe in the story of Noah, it may have been an example of God’s punishment! Only those people who were affected can say for sure…

At any rate, those of us who were spared from the storm or from other natural disasters, do have a responsibility as well..at least according to the Bible, we must apply the Golden Rule…

‘Love your neighbor as yourself.  Matthew 22:39

For me that means, giving what I can when I can – that may mean opening up my wallet, giving clothing or food, offering a listening ear — and of course praying for those who were affected by the storms last week…

So to those who suffered in the storms last week, I offer my condolences, support and prayers…

Also, I hope the lyrics to this song, “I Can See Clearly Now” by Jimmy Cliff also encourage you…

I can see clearly now the rain is gone.
I can see all obstacles in my way.
Here is that rainbow I’ve been praying for.
It’s gonna be a bright (bright)
bright (bright) sunshiny day.
It’s gonna be a bright (bright)
bright (bright) sunshiny day.
It’s going to be a bright (bright)
bright (bright) sunshiny day.
Yeah, hey, it’s gonna be a bright (bright) bright (bright)
sunshiny day.

Any thoughts?

 

P.S. And you know that rainbows are Biblical, right?  This verse appears at the end of the Noah story…

 Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth. Genesis 9:16  

Friends & Financial Compatibility: Is There Such a Thing?

Hello World!!!

For the past two weekends, I have been hanging out with the girls celebrating birthdays, popping bottles, donning funky platform shoes, eating appetizers and spending money…

And if you read a previous post on my financial state, you know that I am trying to “save more, spend less and avoid getting ripped off.” (Clark Howard’s motto) Per my financial coach, I am curtailing my spending money to $100 a month for a while to help pay down some debt and add more to my savings…and it’s working…but $100 isn’t a lot of money it seems…And my eating out money is supposed to come from that $100 according to my financial coach…So when some friends and I decided to celebrate another friend’s birthday by taking her out to eat about a week ago, I made a game plan…And let me backtrack a little…these particular friends are fabulous and don’t mind spending a pretty penny and more on food, drinks and good times…So I made a game plan because with these friends, I’m liable to have more than my share of alcoholic beverages and then be mad the next day when I’m looking over the bill and wondering how I could have drank all of that cash the night before…

So the birthday girl, knowing my cheap nature, started off the dinner saying that she was contributing to the bill. Obviously, that was her way of saying, “I know you’re cheap, and I don’t want you to worry about paying for my meal because I want to eat and drink what I want…” And I appreciated that…(It is typically my friends’ policy to pay for the meal of the birthday girl we are celebrating.) But at the end of the night, some five to six hours later, as I was putting gas in my car at a deserted gas station and looking around for potential carjackers, I realized that I spent $20 more than what I budgeted for.  But hey I decided to chalk that one up to the game…You win some…You lose some…It could have been worse…

So Friday night, when I received a near midnight text that the girls and their men wanted to spend Saturday evening at the Hotel Palomar, I knew that it would be yet another temptation to go outside of my budget…But like a kid following the siren song of the Pied Piper, I went along…and we had fun…and the bill was nearly $500 when DKW and I left…

Before you get me wrong, this is not a criticism of my fabulous friends…If you have the money and want to spend it, that’s your business. But it does bring a larger question into focus…is there such a thing as a financial compatibility? Do you have to hang around people who have the same spending habits that you have? I enjoy having friends of various spending sensibilities. DKW and I are cheap…We get excited about coupons and free events…But I also enjoy hanging out with my fabulous friends when I want to spend literally and figuratively a night on the town…And the Hotel Palomar is a fabulous place to spend a summer evening…The beautiful lounge is atop the hotel. As I sipped my breakfast caipiriha, felt the breeze in my locks and gazed at the twinkling city lights, I almost felt like I was at the beach…(My financial coach and I agreed that I would not take any trips until at least December so I imagine I won’t see the beach again until next year, God willing…)

We have all heard that money issues can be the death of a marriage but what about your friendships? As I said, I think it’s possible to have friends of all types.

Any thoughts?